It all happens so fast when you think about it. A question is asked, an answer is given, a ring is donned, a manicure booked. You can’t stop staring at your finger. Is this really happening? Is this really my hand? Man, my hand looks good. You make the announcement, the questions begin, “Where will it be?”, “When will it be?”, “Who’s standing with you?” “I vote for destination wedding”, “Will you have a candy bar?” (this is just my personal question). Suddenly you’ve traded in your title as “girlfriend” for “fiance + wedding planner” and let’s be honest, the only event you’ve ever really planned was the last get together with your closest friends and you had saltines + block cheese and it was BYOB. Now suddenly you’re thrust into a sea of “vendors” and officiants, flowers, chair dressings, cake tastings, deposits, hair and makeup appointments, save the dates and hotel reservations in bulk! Oh my!
And through the thick of throw away bouquets and centrepieces, here is the biggest challenge you will have: Looking beyond all of these details and remembering the purpose of what you are doing; not losing sight of the ‘why’. You are planning the celebration of the union of two people. You are celebrating your love and commitment to one another. You are inviting your closest friends and families to be present while you declare your intentions as a couple. That’s it! That’s the hardest part. I bet you thought I was going to say that the hardest part would be creating the seating arrangement plan, staying on budget, keeping the day on schedule or watching that uncle Bob doesn’t drink too much. But it’s not that. It’s simply remembering the WHY.
Jeff and I were together for six months before I traded in my title of ‘Girlfriend’ for ‘Wedding Planner.’ Before I knew it I had a binder and a calculator and I was tasting cupcakes wondering how I would plan a gathering for 200+ guests without acquiring a mountain of debt. In hindsight, I am so glad that we kept the focus on us. We had an evening ceremony and celebration all at once, in our own city. We toasted one another, danced to our favourite local deejay and handed out my Dad’s homemade wine for party favours. It was far from the event of the year, but it was true to our relationship and our love for one another. Our goal was simple: let’s throw a party that is 100% us. After all, your wedding day is one day – a really very magical day – and just one of many more that you and your spouse will do together.
The hardest part will be to not be in the details: the dresses, the frosting, the sequins and the backdrop, but instead it will be to not get caught up in any of those things and stay true to the two of you. After all, that is really what this day is all about.
And hey, I’m booking into 2018 now.
I also made you this handy-dandy free wedding planning guide to help take the think-work out of all the details, and let you stay focused on what is important.